


the only exception

by myouwos



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Enemies with benefits?, F/F, Fluff, Inspired by The Devil Wears Prada, but not really, nayeon is an editor in chief and sana a fashion designer, they hate each other, to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:53:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24559477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myouwos/pseuds/myouwos
Summary: everyone in the fashion industry knows about nayeon's hatred of sana, renowned fashion designer with whom she constantly has to work, as expected of vogue's editor in chief- although no one has ever found out why.but their relationship might be a bit more complicated than anyone had first believed. mostly due to the nayeon's inability to stay away from her.ora sanayeon 'the devil wears prada' inspired au, in which nayeon pretends to hate sana, and sana just goes along with it.
Relationships: Im Nayeon/Minatozaki Sana, Park Jisoo | Jihyo/Yoo Jeongyeon
Comments: 23
Kudos: 358





	the only exception

**Author's Note:**

> she didn't ask for it but this is for rach. 🥰
> 
> (my dream of writing nayeon as miranda priestly also came true, we love a powerful milf!) 
> 
> enjoy<3

the days of those who work for vogue korea, the world's most renowned fashion magazine, can easily be separated into two very different and distinct parts. 

  
  


the first few hours of the morning are those of calm, an unusual feeling few would ever associate with the magazine. its building is peaceful, redundant and deafening but nonetheless habitual click of heels filling the halls as everyone rushes to their post in order to arrive in time. no one looks worried, it isn't yet time for anyone to run through the hall towards the elevators or for those who have meetings on the other side of town to cry out for a cab to notice them. 

  
  


(well, no one is worried excluding momo. 

  
  


her job is just a bit different from her coworkers' and no one would ever doubt her word when she describes just how stressful it is, her life sometimes close to a living nightmare, especially on mondays. 

  
  


she has to be in a constant state of stress, has to be ready to receive an angry call or text at any hour of the day- and far too often of the night. but then momo supposes she's a bit more special than everyone around here, starting with who she has to work for every day.

  
  


it doesn't exactly make it better, but at the end of the day, her salary surely does.)

  
  


and then comes the second part. because quite like a horror film would begin, calm is never really a good sign there. especially not when it is broken by the sound of a car stopping right in front of the building, the sight of a black and perfectly maintained maserati never inspiring peacefulness for those who couldn't get to their office in time.

  
  


the temporary heaven that had built there evaporates in an instant as soon as who they love to call the devil finally slips past the double doors of vogue korea, and the atmosphere shifts entirely. it's as if time stops for a short second, everyone taken by the aura of a woman no one will ever dare to face, until they realize who exactly that is and start running, time now accelerating as the crowd parts to let her pass. 

  
  


and those who unluckily did not notice her presence get the pleasure of being glared at through wide dark shades, ones that hide her eyes but aren't enough to contain the silently threatening aura of her look. 

  
  


nayeon absolutely loves it. 

  
  


it's not always been like this, really, she used to be barely respected by her employees. it took years for her to be seen as more than an opportunist who got lucky and managed to take over vogue korea, but when she continued to bring the magazine to new and unimaginable heights, never backing down in front of the concurrence or board members who couldn't stand the thought of a single mother who has been shown in tabloids to appreciate the company of women, is when the fun really started.

  
  


for a short while, nayeon hated the reputation of a severe and cold woman that followed her. she would sue any pseudo journalist who made up rumors about her that only added to the image everyone had of her. but it quickly changed when she realized just how beneficial it was to her, to scare anyone who might contradict her away before they could even think of annoying her.

  
  


and as she steps into the first elevator she finds open, the three men there immediately usher out without a word, an almost invisible smirk lifting the corner of her lips as she watches the doors close.

  
  


but contrary to what she might have believed, nayeon's day is not going to be one she will particularly appreciate. and this, she understands as soon as the elevator opens and she is greeted by the sight of an obviously very nervous momo, her breathing fast as a drop of sweat forms on her forehead. 

  
  


it's enough for her to understand who exactly she's going to have to encounter today.

  
  


"what is it this time, momo?" nayeon asks as she walks toward her office, taking her glasses off now that she knows only her assistant will dare to look at her. everyone is quiet as momo follows after her like a scared puppy, and although she's not blind and knows this sight is one that disappears as soon as she steps into her office, she's glad to know that everyone is working well. "do you intend on making me wait for any more than that or should we find out if i have time to fire you while you tell me about what has you so worried? because  _ that _ would be an interesting game." 

  
  


"sorry, miss im. i just have a feeling that i might ruin your morning with the news i just got from jeongyeon." momo hurries to leave her notebook on her desk as nayeon hands her a purple-colored leather bag, expecting her to put it away like she does each morning. "it's about… miss minatozaki, actually." 

  
  


the editor in chief sighs as momo helps her slip her coat off from her shoulders, but she doesn't wait for her and walks into her office, leaving the door open for her assistant to know to follow. when momo is finally done, she comes rushing into the wide and organized office, gulping when nayeon leans back in her chair and raises her chin lightly. after all these years of working for her, she's able to decipher what each of her mimics means, and the raised chin has never been a good sign. 

  
  


"what about her? are we playing a game i don't know about and i'm supposed to guess what your next words will be?" 

  
  


"no. sorry." momo bows in apology, again, and notes down in a corner of her mind to plan another massage appointment soon when her back hurts at the action- probably because she's been doing it far too much. "she's coming here today. you have a meeting with her right after lunch because jeongyeon thinks we could get exclusivity on her new collection. so, you need to convince her to take care of dressing our models for the june cover." 

  
  


nayeon isn't looking at momo then, and yet she still feels like she's being glared at. she knows just how difficult it has always been between the two- although she has no idea why- and her boss will surely be in a sour mood all day long. 

  
  


"since when have i needed to convince anyone to work with me? jeongyeon is always so useless, thinking minatozaki won't accept as soon as we make the proposal to her. she's insufferable." the editor in chief shakes her head before looking down at the files on her desk, ones she left there last night before leaving to spend time with her daughter, and it's momo's cue to leave the room.

  
  


"w-will you be there, then?" 

  
  


"of course i will. someone needs to put her back in her place when she'll start venting the success of her brand, and who will do so if not me?" 

  
  


and although she's only being sarcastic, nayeon is already wondering about what exactly she could come up with to annoy sana this time.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


sana and nayeon do not just dislike each other. no, that would be too simple.

  
  


their hatred for one another started back in college when they both were the top students of their classes and would constantly fight for the first place. going to fashion school is something that nayeon only saw as an evidence, not having to bother about money when her parents paid for all of her studies without a second thought- although she had to go through years of explaining to do them why she wouldn't take over the family company. meanwhile, for sana, it was all a bit more difficult.

  
  


she had a job on the side, working at a café almost every day of the week, and still barely managed to pay for her studies. and because nayeon always loved to brag, sana naturally couldn't stand her.

  
  


a silent and yet intense war started between the two for three long years, until they both parted ways to continue to do what they loved but in entirely different fields. but those years left scars behind themselves, ones that came from the times nayeon made sure that sana wouldn't have any friends around campus, and only increased by sana stealing nayeon's girlfriend- she hadn't even liked her and only did it to rile her up, which did work amazingly well. 

  
  


and despite all of this, they both came a long way since college. today, nayeon is editor in chief of vogue korea, the country's most popular magazine and an edition celebrated in the world for its original and flawless covers. meanwhile sana is prada's new fashion designer, which explains why she spends half of her year working in italy and the other one in korea, the country that always worked best with her wild imagination. 

  
  


both are doing amazingly well, but what bothers nayeon is that even today, she has to see sana on a regular basis whether to discuss business or to discover her new collections before anyone else. sana, it seems, is not as annoyed with it as she is, and actually appears to take great pleasures in watching a flustered nayeon try to annoy her.

  
  


but in reality, nayeon has never been able to outwardly tell sana that she hates her. 

  
  


(certainly because she doesn't. 

  
  


but pretending that she does makes it easier.)

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


the meeting goes relatively well, to everyone's surprise. 

  
  


sure, nayeon never deigns to look at sana, instead finding great interest in a blue pen she fiddles with. but it's still a lot better than what usually takes place in a room in which reside both of the fashion industry's well-known enemies. 

  
  


it's normal for everyone to be shocked by the tense and yet not explosive atmosphere, nayeon has used them to sharp and petty remarks being thrown at sana, not to a heavy silence only punctuated by nods or raised eyebrows when she wants to let someone know of her dissatisfaction.

  
  


and she can see just how out of the ordinary this is in the eyes of her employees, jeongyeon staring with pleasant surprise during the entire meeting as if waiting for the moment she will ruin all of it and go back to her usual self. but she doesn't, not exactly at least, and it comes an end with a signed contract on the table and pleased smiles.

  
  


that is, until nayeon decides to speak. 

  
  


"minatozaki, stay here for a minute would you. we need to talk about something." the editor in chief says as everyone stands up from their seat, glad to know that the two hours long meeting is finally over. jeongyeon's face falls and she hurries to grab the contract before momo can take it, scared that nayeon will suddenly lose her mind and tear it into pieces- if she fears this situation happening, it's because she's seen far worse than that from her best friend. 

  
  


"of course. but you better be quick, i'm not working for you in case you forgot." sana smirks as she sits back down, her place opposite of nayeon on the wide table perfect for her to watch over her every reaction. 

  
  


the room is quick to empty after that, certainly because no one wants to risk being here when the tension finally breaks and sana and nayeon show their true colors. that is, what they think their true colors are. because no one but them could actually know about what happens behind closed doors, and it certainly is better that way.

  
  


"will you get the blinds or should i do this for you too?" sana asks, her legs crossed as she leans back in her seat comfortably, watching as nayeon glares at her but does as told.

  
  


there's a moment of silence afterward, nayeon walking around the table until she's close enough to sana to see the sparkle in her eyes and the slight traces of a smirk on her lips. it's always been that way between them, quiet until one of them gets brave enough to speak up and with it, to quite literally close the gap left between them. and no matter how often nayeon insists on her hatred for sana being unrivaled, her breathing becomes more intense with each passing second as she sits on the edge of the table, teasingly leaning back until the temptation to look down from her eyes becomes too hard for sana to handle. 

  
  


because it always does. even when she swears to herself not to fall for it, even when she knows that she could very well walk out right now and nayeon probably wouldn't get as upset as she imagines, sana always willingly falls into the trap that is im nayeon. 

  
  


"what did you want to talk about?" but today, sana's resolve is a bit stronger than usual. 

  
  


"should i get naked on this table for you to understand what exactly i wanted us to talk about?" and the fashion designer can only laugh when nayeon genuinely looks offended by her question, huffing as she avoids sana's stare in shame. 

  
  


"i mean, i wouldn't exactly be against that." her smile is smug and proud and everything nayeon hates about her, and yet hatred is the furthest thing from her mind as the fashion designer stands up to take place between her legs, never breaking eye contact as she waits for nayeon to give in first. 

  
  


it used to be a game, one that began after a drunk and confusing night that never really reached an end. they had found each other in a bar, alone and too late at night for it to have been anything but an unhealthy coping mechanism. and because even after all these years of a pseudo competition neither of them ever really lost, they were never able to stay away from each other, the night had ended with them gravitating toward one another in a cheap hotel room. 

  
  


but with the lack of a winner, the game had never really been able to stop. and even after shame invaded nayeon when she woke in bed with the woman she swore to despise for the rest of her life, she hadn't been able to tear to pieces the piece of paper sana slipped into her hand before leaving, a phone number she barely uses hurriedly written down on it.

  
  


neither of them ever tried to talk about this seriously, because it would be of no use. not when nayeon is adamant to them keeping up the appearances of their so-called hatred. not when sana knows she would be far better off without giving her heart any hope of its dreams ever coming true, endlessly waiting for what it believes to be its other half. and although rules were made at first, they were all broken no more than a few days after their installation. 

  
  


"i'm not sure you deserve to see me like that just yet." nayeon's lips part, as if waiting for sana to close the now barely visible gap between them and sate the ache spreading in her chest as she waits for a brush of her lips, a touch of her knowledgeable fingers, for anything that would make her forget about her life, really. "you're too annoying for me to ever allow that."

  
  


"shut up, im." 

  
  


sana almost never pulls away from nayeon, lips dancing along with hers in an endless and passionate kiss. it used to be a rule, forbidden in case it ever blurred the lines of their already fragile relationship, but like all of the others, that did not last long.

  
  


it's the only way for nayeon to keep quiet when sana's hands finally explore the sensitive surface of her inner thighs, low moans barely muffled by greedy lips when she finds all of her weak spots with the simple flick of her fingers. and both are too addicted to the feeling of the other's lips to ever try to establish that one rule again, nayeon's taste not one sana believes she could live without now.

  
  


and because it would be too much of a loving moment otherwise, nayeon always has to whisper a barely audible "i hate you." in her ear right before she feels like her world is crumbling down, sana's arms keeping her up as if her life depended on it. 

  
  


certainly because no matter what nayeon thinks, it really does. 

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


there used to be pain spreading around her heart like an invisible and freezing cobweb when nayeon would make it clear that even after all of this, even after allowing herself to fall apart in sana's arms, she would always dislike her. 

  
  


but with time, the pain was replaced by sorrow, feelings she kept to herself because they made this a lot more real than she should ever have allowed it to only growing more intense. that is, until sorrow, with time, disappeared, and the petals protecting what her heart has been screaming for her to understand but her mind refused to see slowly fell, one after the other. a naked rose, stripped of its red robe for nayeon to see, if only she ever deigned to open her eyes and face the reality she and sana have been trapped in. 

  
  


but its thorns never left, and by ignoring the singular and eye-catching rose, refusing to pick it up, nayeon might also be making the right choice.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"did you and sana get in a fight? should i ask for security to forbid her from entering the building from now on-" momo asks as soon as nayeon reappears in front of her desk thirty minutes later, staring at her with wide worried eyes.

  
  


"gosh, no! none of us fought, we're not cavemen, momo." nayeon stops in front of her desk, wondering why her assistant would even think her capable of such an act. "what makes you say that?"

  
  


the deep blush spreading on her cheeks as she looks away, attempting to avoid nayeon's glare, is telling. the assistant mumbles inaudible words and is startled when nayeon crosses her arms- second on her list of 'not a good sign' of nayeon mimics, first being the rolling eyes. 

  
  


"it's just… your hair is a bit messy." and as if realizing what she just said, momo visibly cringes, waiting for nayeon to either scream at her that she's fired or walk away and call HR without even warning her about it. but the reaction she witnesses is entirely different from that and leave her dumbfounded for long minutes.

  
  


"w-what? my hair is as it should be." nayeon stutters, actually stutters in front of her assistant, something she's definitely never done before, as she takes momo's phone from its place on her desk and stares at her own reflection in its black screen. her gasp only adds to the shock, but what momo knows she better keep as a secret if she wants to keep her job- and probably if she wants to ever be hired anywhere else- is the light pink gracing the editor in chief's cheeks in what she easily guesses to be shame. "that's… that was done on purpose! not that i would expect you to know about those from the look of those boring jeans but it's a new trend everyone has been doing. i can't believe you work for the editor in chief of this country's best fashion magazine and still aren't up to date with trends."

  
  


and without a word, nayeon walks away, the click of her heels a clock that seems to be counting down to the day momo will upset nayeon just a bit too much and actually get fired. but right now, from the look of it as nayeon closes her office door in a loud sound, her job is still hers, no matter how much she hates it.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"crazy how you haven't said anything yet but i already know i won't like it." 

  
  


jeongyeon sighs, exasperated by her best friend who also happens to be her boss, and closes the door behind herself, cringing when she sees the look of pity momo throws her way right before she locks them in the office. it's enough for her to know that nayeon arrived annoyed this morning, which truly never means anything good for her- or for anyone who might cross her way today, really. 

  
  


when she turns around to face her, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves and, at the same occasion, make sure she doesn't ruin her chances of getting her point across nayeon before she starts throwing a child-like tantrum, jeongyeon immediately understands just how difficult this is going to be.

  
  


"i'm happy to see you too, nayeon. and i'm sure you'll be too, because i actually am coming here with good news!" but it seems the excitement overflowing from her voice barely works in convincing the editor in chief of her so-called good intentions, and nayeon only raises an eyebrow, still refusing to look up from the last issue of vanity fair. 

  
  


(probably because it features sana on its cover. 

  
  


as soon as momo took the daily magazines she makes sure to place on nayeon's desk each morning, and her eyes fell upon the smiling designer, her orange hair catching the eye of anyone who might carelessly look its way, she wondered if throwing it away wasn't the best option out of all of them- the second one was to place it under the entire pile and hope nayeon would, for once in her life, not do her job properly and give up before she got to it. 

  
  


but of course she hadn't. not because she didn't want to, but because she received a text from her driver warning her of nayeon's arrival and had simply forgotten about it.

  
  


if asked, nayeon would simply say she loves the traditional photoshoot an unknown actress had on pages fifty to fifty-six. but in reality, she hasn't been able to look away from sana and the outfits she certainly herself put together, admiring not only her grace and beauty but also her talent, something she's never doubted, not even back then when she would have wanted to be better, more loved and appreciated by their professors than she herself was.

  
  


despite the bitterness residing in her heart still today, her fingers slowly trace her features on the picture as nostalgia for something she's never truly had fills her heart to replace its artificial anger.)

  
  


"the last time i heard actual good news from you was the day you announced you were getting married to jihyo." nayeon finally looks up from the angel-like face of the woman she hates certainly as much as she appreciates, leaning back in her seat as she pretends to appear pensive. "that was… two years ago. so excuse me for my very obvious lack of trust in anything you might say."

  
  


"first of all, that was three years ago. and this is actually good for the magazine and for you as well. " jeongyeon doesn't wait for nayeon to invite her further into the room before taking the seat in front of her, smoothing the jacket of her pantsuit as she gets ready to drop what could very well be described as a time bomb on nayeon. "with the exception of a small detail." 

  
  


"what is it now?" the editor in chief groans, getting ready to go in a rant over her job not being paid well enough for what she has to stand every day- which is definitely not true considering she was one of the country's richest women last year, and the five years before that, obviously always alongside sana. "do i have to call back my ex to ask her to promote the magazine again? or will it be my ex's ex this time?" 

  
  


"come on, that was one time!" jeongyeon is quick to protest, wondering how anyone could be as resentful as nayeon. 

  
  


"and yeri is still waiting for me to go out with her as payback! what are you going to do about this? take my place?"

  
  


"look, shut up, we need to talk about serious matters here. i don't care about you not wanting your ex to invite you to one of seoul's most expensive restaurants." gathering her notes, jeongyeon sighs one last time. "we've thought about the june cover a lot and came to what we think is the best decision we could have found."

  
  


certainly for nothing more than dramatic effect, she marks a long pause, waiting to see if nayeon understands what she's trying to say although she only finds confusion in her features.

  
  


"and considering june also is your five years anniversary with vogue… we all agreed that the best way to celebrate this would be to have  _ you _ on the cover." jeongyeon shouts in excitement right after her announcement, waiting for nayeon's still unfazed expression to mirror her own smile, but nothing happens. instead, nayeon stares at her incredulously, and she's suddenly glad that jihyo forced her to change her mind on the whole celebration she had first planned to share the surprise with nayeon.

  
  


"i currently am very happy about this. but i refuse to celebrate until you tell me about that one detail you're clearly trying to hide from me." 

  
  


her smile immediately dies down as jeongyeon suddenly gets back to her business self, wondering why she agreed to be the one to pass the message to the eternally moody editor in chief. 

  
  


"remember prada's new collection? we got the deal. and sana will be in charge of the shoot." 

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


momo looks up from her nails when jeongyeon quite literally rushes out of the office, closing the door shut behind herself and keeping it that way by leaning back against it. 

  
  


"sorry, sir, can i call you back in a minute." the assistant says, staring at jeongyeon's form up and down with clear fear in her eyes- not that she's scared of her, no, the marketing director is one of the few friends she found here, momo actually fears for what happened in there. 

  
  


"any errands you have to run for?" jeongyeon asks, still panting, and the loud sound of a non-identified object being thrown against the door makes her pause. "because i really would advise you leave. right now."

  
  


by the time nayeon opens the door, rage filled eyes looking for anyone to release her fury on the first person she will find, she finds an empty office and an 'i'm sorry. your first meeting with sana is next monday.' note poised on momo's desk. 

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


nayeon sees sana before monday comes, and it all happens rather unexpectedly. 

  
  


as the editor in chief of vogue korea, she obviously gets invited to most of the runway shows happening in the country, always diligently choosing which one she will deign to spend her precious time on. and that's how she finds herself sitting on the first row of an exciting show as models walk in front of her and the crowd of journalists, fashion designers and celebrities of varying importance sit next to her, supposedly watching the new creations a relatively unknown but nonetheless overly talented designer selected for them to see. 

  
  


but when nayeon had agreed to come here, going through what she had believed to be promising pieces the designer, son chaeyoung, had reviewed in the invitation she sent her, sana had been the last thing on her mind. certainly because she didn't expect her to ever come to a still rising designer's show, not when it's not her job.

  
  


that was without counting on the fact that sana was one of chaeyoung's closest friends and would, very obviously, be attending the show along with the country's most prestigious fashion influencers and professionals. and it so happened that instead of staying far off in the back, front row seats far from being easy to get, that is, unless you quite literally control a fashion empire, sana had chosen the seat on the other side of the runway, right in front of nayeon.

  
  


what had been supposed to be an interesting and pleasing fashion show had turned into a glaring contest as soon as a flash of bright orange hair caught nayeon's eye, a color that is undeniably hard to forget, and one that the editor in chief has been seeing everywhere she goes recently, always expecting sana to be near her even on the other side of the planet. 

  
  


(and she is. 

  
  


there is not a time when sana isn't occupying her mind at least once a day, swimming around her heart and searching for a place to settle, refusing to ever let go and leave her haunted mind. 

  
  


but then nayeon supposes that's no one's fault but her own.

  
  


she's the one who can't let go, the one begging for more when it all comes to an end, and sana has simply never been able to deny her anything. )

  
  


a piece of well-chosen music starts playing as the first model walks past the curtains and begins her walk onto the runway, and when nayeon knows she's expected to look up, knows that she would be taking in the outfit son chaeyoung designed and taking mental notes concerning their creativity and quality, an invisible force keeps her from looking away from sana's playful brown eyes. 

  
  


because of course, sana is happy to see her. it only means she gets another opportunity to rile her up, a teasing smirk nayeon thinks only the devil would be able to reproduce on her lips as she raises a taunting eyebrow when nayeon's glare intensifies.

  
  


the urge to reach for her phone in her purse is getting more and more intense with each passing second, what had been calm music playing now becoming louder and more pronounced as if reflecting the increasing rhythm of her heartbeat. she wants to text sana to quit it, wants her to know that although she is treating their relationship as such, this isn't a game and especially not one she will ever win.

  
  


because she knows who came up with the great and wonderful idea of prada's new collection being featured on the june cover with her. she knows who suggested it to jeongyeon because when she finally managed to see her- it took a few days for the marketing director to let her guard down and find nayeon waiting for her in her office, sitting on her desk with a threatening smile gracing her lips- she had no choice but to tell her about it. and she's definitely not about to let it go as easily as sana imagines. 

  
  


the show is almost over when they finally look away from each other, nayeon being the first one to give up although it is with annoyance, and it only then hits her that the attention of most of the journalists in the room is not focused on the show but on her, and on the silent fight she and sana just had.

  
  


sighing, she rolls her eyes, already able to imagine the headlines next morning, which will probably all be about the comparisons they love to make about her being some sort of devil and sana, an angel who has learned to fight back. her PR team won't let her see the end of it for days, just like they did the last time something similar happened at a givenchy exposition. 

  
  


the sound of momo clapping next to her brings her back to the show and quickly, her eyes swipe through the many outfits she missed, noting that as she had expected, chaeyoung is a very promising designer, one she will be the first one to work with judging from the admirative and tremulous look she's staring at her with. everyone is waiting for her reaction, barely clapping in case the editor in chief suddenly decides that the show was bad, because quite like an orchestra, nayeon is the one telling what instrument to play and when, the only difference here is that instead, she guides people's opinions from the simple raise of an eyebrow. 

  
  


choosing to end the heavy- and for chaeyoung certainly very stressful- silence, nayeon stands up from her seat and joins momo, clapping with a light but nonetheless pleased smile that makes everyone breathe a sigh of relief. 

  
  


a career was quite evidently made on that day. and yet, nayeon couldn't care less about the show, not when she spots sana slowly walking toward her side of the room.

  
  


"i'm honored you accepted my invitation and came to my first show." chaeyoung's voice forces her to look away from sana, the crowd now dispersed around the room as the designer left the stage to join nayeon. momo is right next to her, phone out in case she needs to take notes. "you're a living legend in the industry and… i would love to know what you thought of the collection."

  
  


and at first, nayeon simply chuckles, brushing off the compliment with a movement of her hand. until she freezes, realizing that chaeyoung is expecting a short but nonetheless important review of what she saw, waiting for her to voice out her opinion with eager puppy eyes and trembling hands. 

  
  


but nayeon can barely remember more than a long skirt that caught her attention, one she could very well imagine seeing in one of the pages of her magazine. the only outfit she saw, really. because even now, all that's on her mind as she desperately tries to remember even the smallest of details about the show is the intense gaze sana reserved for her, as if aware of just how much it affects her. it's unfair, the need that coursed through her veins when sana's eyes temporarily left her own to trail down her body, very obviously stopping on her legs before going back up to wink at her.

  
  


right before she's about to risk making a mistake and confusing chaeyoung, no real compliments coming to the tip of her tongue when it's usually something she's an expert in, a hand settles on her waist and a voice dripping with honey cuts her off. 

  
  


"it was more than she could have ever expected, i'm sure. nayeon here as always been a big fan of purple, and you've made a very daring and yet interesting choice here by presenting it to the audience in so many of its shades while making it all match, without any exception." sana's hold around her waist tightens, and she's too shocked by her bold behavior to get away, simply moving a step closer to the renowned designer who makes sure to pull her closer. "i'm sure she was so impressed by your talent at such a young age that she simply couldn't look away."

  
  


it is indeed a rare sight for anyone to witness the dreaded editor in chief lose her composure, and it explains the blinding flash of photographs suddenly being directed at them, ones nayeon could not miss as they force her eyelids to fall shut for a short instant. but sana isn't planning on letting the press depict another derogatory image of nayeon and in a silent reminder of their audience, her nails sink into her skin, barely hurting her through the thick material of her silk shirt in a reminder that they are being watched.

  
  


"right. couldn't have said it better, the show was amazing." nayeon nods absentmindedly although no one but sana notices, and she hates herself for feeling so out of control around a woman she is supposed to despise with every cell of her being. "i'm sure we will be working together a lot after today."

  
  


"that's more than i could ever ask for. thank you." chaeyoung bows respectfully, her smile so wide that she struggles to get it back under her control, and it's the last thing nayeon sees before sana whispers quietly in her ear.

  
  


"meet me in the restroom in five."

  
  


and of course, nayeon does as told. 

  
  


sometimes, she wonders if the one she hates in all of this really is sana. perhaps is it because she knows that even after long years of trying, after the years of petty and tiring fighting, her anger and hatred are nothing but manufactured wishes she refuses to let go of. perhaps is it because she's realized that nothing has ever been able to keep her from going back for more, for more supposedly meaningless kisses, more bruises born from a need to express what is forbidden, more heavy gazes that speak louder than words ever could. 

  
  


nayeon wonders if she should hate herself for it instead.

  
  


as she slowly makes her way out of the main room, greeting her many acquaintances on the way and granting a short interview to a journalist, nothing around her matters more than the ache spreading in her chest. and the longer she stays away from sana, the harder it becomes to ignore. 

  
  


this might be the first time nayeon admits to herself that, after all, she might not want to ignore it anymore. 

  
  


"that was seven minutes. i've been used to way better punctuality coming from you." sana speaks before she's even had time to close the door behind herself, making sure that no one followed her here with a quick but effective glance. after so many years spent being venerated as much as she has been hated, nayeon knows the lengths people will go to when it comes to bringing her down. 

  
  


"shut up, i had to give an interview to praise your little protégé. be thankful." 

  
  


"thankful for what exactly?" sana sounds almost mocking, and when it used to ignite a burning fire of anger in her, the urge to close the distance separating them until she's pinned against the wall sounds a lot more promising. "you and i both know chaeyoung will be an amazing asset to you when the time comes. i think you should be the one thanking me instead." 

  
  


the water stops running then, and sana is looking at her through the mirror, a glint in her eyes that makes them sparkle teasingly. it feels as if sana knows exactly what's going on inside of nayeon's chest, knows about the rapid beat of her heart, a deafening sound she hates for what it proves, for the way it forces her to face what should be an evidence. it feels as if sana already knows how this is going to end.

  
  


and she does, not because of a sixth sense nayeon unfortunately lacks. but because it's all so easy, nayeon and her eternal need to be close to her, their relationship and what it means, the way she falls apart under the lightest of touch. it's easy, and yet neither of them has ever been able to move past old resentment nor to figure out why the lines separating them are still blurry, scared of what it would mean to do so.

  
  


"you know i can't do that in here." nayeon glances at the door, wondering if she actually locked it well or if the risk of someone suddenly entering is as high as she fears. but when she looks back at sana, that's the last thing on her mind.

  
  


slowly, the woman approaches her, and nayeon's eyes naturally travel down from piercing brown eyes to her body, admiring her dress, black with pink flowers scattered all of the clearly expensive material, one she knows comes from the new collection she has spent months working on. it reveals too much skin for her heart not to skip a beat when her back hits the wall and only then does she realize that she was walking backward with each step sana took, aware of how useless it all is.

"and yet, i could think of a few ways for you to express your immense gratitude towards me while keeping you quiet. it seems you've been having a hard time with that recently but, i found just the solution for that." when sana pauses in her speech, she's close enough to nayeon to feel her breath grazing her cheek as her chest moves rapidly, the only evidence she needs to know that it won't take much for her to do as told. 

  
  


nayeon gulps, and as if remembering that she's the one who's supposed to be in control now, brings her hands on sana's hips and pulls her closer. the silence is heavy of untold needs, their chest right against each other allowing them to feel the other better than they ever could. 

  
  


"and what would that be? what great idea did you come up with this time?" 

  
  


sana's smile intensifies, as if suddenly aware of how close she is to getting nayeon to let go of her editor in chief persona, one that appears to have made it a mission to dethrone the devil. her lips brush nayeon's ear, and she shivers, arching her neck almost naturally before sana has even spoken to her.

  
  


and when she knows the anticipation is getting too much for her, when she knows nayeon understands that this time will not be one of hate and petty fights but of a shared and overwhelming passion, sana murmurs in her ear. 

  
  


"get on your knees." 

  
  


stunned by the request, nayeon is speechless at first, her cheeks reddening by the second as sana only watches amusedly, her laugh breaking a now tense silence. only then does she understands that sana is simply making fun of her, but it doesn't stop her from thinking about it, from wondering if she wouldn't want it to be an actual order instead. the dangerous trail of thoughts she's brought onto is interrupted by the designer laughing even harder, laughter only dying down when her lips find another occupation, kissing down the column of nayeon's neck.

  
  


"i'm kidding, wouldn't want you to hurt your knees." sana says, momentarily pulling away to face her. "your hand is more than enough." 

  
  


but right as nayeon reaches for her thighs, hand slowly moving up and with it the fabric of her dress, she stops. they both look back when the sound of approaching click of heels reaches them. a hand settles on the doorknob and both of them stop breathing for a short second, scared to find out that nayeon did not lock it while being in such a position. and yet, neither of them makes a move to step back, two magnets unable to fight back against the need to stand close, the need to form one distinctive shadow against the wall. 

  
  


but the door doesn't budge, and whoever tried to enter is quick to walk away, allowing the two of them to finally breathe properly, sighs of relief filling the room as nayeon's hand falls back against the wall in a soft thud.

  
  


"so, where were we?" sana doesn't wait for nayeon's pulse to slow down, already back to pinning her against the wall, and it seems the editor in chief has changed her mind in the short time during which the mood was broken.

  
  


"i was about to leave you hanging there from what i can remember. and that's exactly what i'm going to do." and although she can't help but glance down at her lips and how inviting they look, nayeon manages to slip from sana's grasp without difficulty, walking to the sink because she's in serious need of cold water to calm her racing heart down. "i said no to public places a long time ago." 

  
  


she doesn't need to look up from the running water to know that sana is now standing right behind her, keeping enough distance between them to not overcrowd nayeon too much. her eyes are dark and heavy-lidded, the surface of a stormy sky in which shines an eternal brightness, a star that will always guide nayeon to her even when she knows her way, even when she refuses to follow its path. 

  
  


"pretty sure the last time we saw each other was in a conference room. but i suppose that's not considered as-"

  
  


"would you rather we simply stop seeing each other?" nayeon asks, rolling her eyes before she turns around to face her one last time. 

  
  


despite the fact that she should have left already, sana reaches for one of nayeon's hand, intertwined fingers gently sealing the everlasting bond that links them to each other. there's so much she would like to say, so much she would like to confess, but she knows she can't. by fear of unrequited feelings as much as by fear of losing the messy and yet needed relationship she and nayeon have. 

  
  


"don't ask questions you already know the answer to." 

  
  


instead of staring at each other like they usually would, usually fighting to have the last word, both are focused on the soft hold of their hand, and on what it means. 

  
  


"perhaps do i need to hear you say it." 

  
  


nayeon being vocal about her feelings is rare enough to break the moment, and it feels as if they were both floating around each other and suddenly got pulled back to the ground to face reality. it's clear in her eyes that sana is shocked by the confession, and she looks at nayeon with such love then that neither of them could ever be able to deny what's actually going on between them without willingly lying. 

  
  


"perhaps am i scared that you'll run away the second i start speaking." 

  
  


shaking her head, words of denial are on the tip of her tongue, but something keeps her from speaking, from lying. and instead, nayeon looks at sana one last time before letting go of her hand, and walks out of the room silently. but what sana doesn't know is that the second she disappears from her view, nayeon has to lean back against the wall, her legs trembling far too much to hold her up on their own any longer. 

  
  


her heart is beating fast, resonating deafeningly in her ears in a numbing melody, one that is enough for her to understand that someday, she will have to make an exception if she wants to experience what for now stays as unfulfilled dreams. 

  
  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  
  


when sana cries, it isn't from pain, or from fear.

  
  


it's because she knows. 

  
  


she knows that, despite never truly having her, she will never be able to let nayeon go. 

  
  


it feels liberating, to put words over years of silent pinning and loud fights. and when she used to think it would be her downfall, sana realizes that she's never slept better since she met nayeon than on that night, an eternal smile on her lips as she finally allows herself to imagine what it would be like, to love nayeon unconditionally. 

  
  


but what takes a longer time for her to understand, is that she already knows what it's like. no, what sana has yet to have experienced isn't loving nayeon.

  
  


it's being loved back.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"come in, i've been waiting for you!" nayeon hears from the other side of the door, sana's voice muffled but clear enough for her to hear. 

  
  


taking a deep breath, she tries to calm her nerves down before entering, aware of sana's sharp senses when it comes to reading through her. if she shows even the smallest of hint that could lead her to find out just how nervous she is about working with her, sana will definitely not let it go. and really, she's not about to let that happen. 

  
  


the first detail she notices when she enters the atelier sana works in- which is situated in her penthouse, because quite like nayeon she's never been able to separate work and her private life- is the puppy that rushes to welcome her, barking at her feet as she almost jumps from the shock. the last time she came here, there was no puppy in sight- not that she looked around the place much, sana had simply not allowed her to and all she can remember from that night is the bed. 

  
  


despite her love of dogs, nayeon still gets scared when one acts hostile towards her, but the squeals echoing in the room are thankfully enough to bring sana out of hiding and she's quick to rush for her help when she sees nayeon quite literally trying to morph with the wall in order to avoid the puppy. her first reaction is to laugh, because the small shiba will never hurt her, but when she realizes just how scared nayeon is, she doesn't waste any more time and brings it in her arms.

  
  


"aki won't do you any harm. he's just not used to you yet." sana reassures her, apologetic as she brings him to another room and leaves him there, closing the door behind herself in order to be able to focus on nayeon for the time being. "you're so cute, getting scared of a puppy." 

  
  


and nayeon scoffs, brushing sana's hands away when she tries to reach for her cheeks, certainly to pinch them like she used to do every time she got the opportunity to. 

  
  


"don't touch me. i know i'm hard to resist but i would rather you keep your hands to yourself." slipping out of her heels, nayeon walks past her and makes a beeline for the door leading to her atelier, expecting it to be there considering that's where sana came from. "for now."

  
  


looking around the room, nayeon is surprised by how organized it looks, everything seemingly in place although she does notice some scarfs sticking out of a drawer as if thrown there hurriedly. it's not hard for her to understand that sana surely only tidied the room because she knew she was coming. 

  
  


"let's get to work then." 

  
  


a light gasp slips past nayeon's lips when she hears sana right behind her, and instead of turning to face her, she decides to check out the drafts sana was apparently working on before her arrival. she would recognize the way she draws among hundreds of designers, sharp edges and bright colors reminding her of the drawings she used to stare at in jealousy back in college. still today, her talent amazes the editor in chief, and the fashion lover in her can not help but stare in pure wonder at the new creations. 

  
  


"i selected quite a few outfits from the new collection i'd like you to try, then i'll choose four of them-"

  
  


" _ we _ will be choosing them together." nayeon adds, flipping through the pages of an old notebook sana uses to draw once in a while. it makes sana roll her eyes although she misses it, but she should have expected so from nayeon.

  
  


"of course, but when have our tastes not been the same?" sana sighs, already preparing the outfits she knows nayeon will love. "so,  _ we _ will choose four and then if needed, save two to the side. the photoshoot is next week, and i trust we should be able to finish this today. tomorrow at the latest if needed."

  
  


and it all almost goes as planned. 

  
  


nayeon disappears in the dressing room sana made sure to prepare for her, reappearing in one of the outfits selected for her. most of them fit her, some need adjustment, but overall they're both cordial with each other and able to keep the tension from rising too high. 

  
  


at least that's what sana thought, but she supposes that did not work out as well as they'd both wanted considering nayeon is currently sleeping in her bed, head on her chest as she clings to her waist. the sheets have been lazily thrown away and she's thankful for the fresh air of her room, her skin still burning from nayeon's rough touches, a predicament they both find themselves in. and as she admires the peacefulness in her features as she sleeps, sana decides that she wants this moment to last forever.

  
  


it's been so long since she and nayeon saw each other in such private settings, usually fond of expensive hotel rooms that allow them to separate the personal aspect of their lives and the moments they lose themselves in each other. the last time nayeon woke up in her bed with sana clinging to her side, she had quite literally ran away in shame, leaving most of her belongings because she couldn't stand looking at sana any more than she already had. it might be what drives her not to ask her to wake up even if it's the middle of the day and nayeon is one of the country's busiest women. 

gently so as not to wake her, her fingers tangle in her short hair, brushing it away from her eyes in a tender gesture. nayeon doesn't move at first, until she starts whining in her sleep, arms tightening around sana's waist as if trying to get closer to her- which is simply impossible, but she's not going to refuse that to nayeon either, and helps her move higher up the bed until her face is tucked in her neck and their legs are a tangled mess of limbs. 

  
  


the heat of their brushing skin is nothing but a meaningless detail now and is certainly not going to keep her away from nayeon, even if she knows she'll never be able to join her in sleep. sana far prefers getting to appreciate the moment anyway, mostly because she knows such a calm nayeon, one who does not hide how she feels and how she is around her, is an extremely rare sight. 

  
  


and if she could reach for her phone without the risk of breaking the moment, sana's entire photo gallery would be filled with pictures of nayeon right now, in this instant she knows will be precious to her for a very, very long time. 

  
  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  
  


"you're staring." 

  
  


it's been two hours since nayeon fell asleep in her arms and her own eyes are close to falling shut when she finally awakes, breaking what had been a comfortable and peaceful silence. realizing that her hand is still caressing her cheek, sana wonders if she should put it away before nayeon rudely asks her to, but when the editor in chief doesn't move, her eyes still closed, she decides against it.

  
  


"you're beautiful. can't blame me for it." 

  
  


it's enough for nayeon to slowly open her eyes, blinking from the blinding light as she tries to focus on sana. a smile replaces her earlier neutral features, shy and embarrassed, and the blush sana knows only she can get from her is back. one of the same kind graces her lips and her thumb leaves her cheek to brush against her bottom lip, the desire to close the distance left between them and bring her in a kiss hard to ignore. 

  
  


but she doesn't need to do that. because nayeon seems to be having very similar ideas and does it for her. 

  
  


the usual urgency is gone this time, the kiss a simple brush of lips that means more than anything that took place in the bed they're still in. certainly because this one feels real, as if nayeon finally let go of the leash she kept around her heart and allowed it to beat, for sana. 

  
  


as if nayeon finally decided to make an exception, one that might last longer than the time needed for a kiss to reach an end. the exception of a lifetime, the last step taken to bring her closer to sana than she had ever been before. 

  
  


and when sana deepens the kiss, guiding nayeon to lay on her back as she rests on top of her, she silently promises to be worth it. to be worth nayeon risking the deepest and most precious parts of herself. 

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"sana?" nayeon's eyes widen comically as she blocks the entrance to her house with her body, looking almost guilty. but that seems to be a detail the redhead doesn't notice, surely because she's having a hard time looking away from the cute pink apron nayeon is wearing over her work clothes. "what are you doing here? we're not supposed to meet until saturday for the shoot." 

  
  


"that's not… what i came here for, actually." hands gripping the straps of her leather bag tightly, sana looks almost ashamed, as if her subconscious had brought her here in front of nayeon but for a reason that seems to escape her mind. "i wanted to talk to you about something and thought it would be nice to pass by. i haven't seen minyoung in a long time too." 

  
  


nayeon is about to speak when she gets interrupted by a voice sana thinks she's heard somewhere, although she couldn't remember who it was from. but what she's sure of is that this is not nayeon's seven-year-old daughter, and therefore not someone who should be here, in her house, in the middle of her day off.

  
  


a woman appears behind nayeon although she's partly hidden by the editor in chief who refuses to move from the entrance, only looking back with embarrassment and a hint of shame. gently, she pushes nayeon to the left and steps out of the house, an arm possessively settling on nayeon's waist as she stares at sana in what screams to be fake interest.

  
  


"who is it?" 

  
  


although sana swore to never become arrogant, rare are those who do not know her in korea. and when she finally understands who has just joined them, she's pretty sure that the question is one asked only to annoy her and not due to an honest interrogation. 

  
  


"sana. that's minatozaki sana, fashion designer for prada, you know, i told you about her." nayeon says, desperately trying to avoid sana's confused glare and yeri's clearly bad intentions. 

  
  


"oh, you mean the woman who made your life a living hell back then." yeri tries to appear innocent but her tone is threatening enough for sana to understand exactly what she's implying. "hi, nayeon is a bit… busy, right now. sorry about that."

  
  


they both shake hands, and sana suddenly remembers who she is, images of both she and nayeon flashing through her mind. her grip tightens on her hand, and yeri visibly grits her teeth. not only does she remember who yeri is, an actress who's hard to miss from her omnipresence in the media, sana is also reminded of how hard it was for her to see nayeon on the arm of someone else. that had been before they both got involved, right before they finished college, and her jealousy then had been almost uncontrolled.

  
  


mostly because she had refused to admit how badly she wanted to be in yeri's shoes, which had definitely made it complicated for her to face her growing feelings. but today, things are a little bit different. sana knows what she wants, and seeing yeri here, a clear obstacle to her final goal, is definitely not pleasing.

  
  


"perhaps should you come back another day. well, not that i won't be there again, but i suppose i could get out of your way while you talk." and when she looks away from sana, her glare turns into a loving look, one that is far too real for her to doubt her sincerity. nayeon's blush only intensifies when she kisses her on the cheek, and what used to be a reaction only she managed to get out of nayeon is now hers as well. she hates it, but stays silent.

  
  


sighing, nayeon takes a step closer to sana, slipping away from yeri's grasp. "don't listen to her, it's only minyoung and i here. but call me, okay? that will be easier." 

  
  


and with these last words, ones that do work in giving sana hope of all of this being a big misunderstanding, nayeon reaches for her hand, squeezing it softly in a gesture she can easily read.

  
  


no matter what it looks like, sana is the only exception nayeon will ever make. all she needs to do is to take the final step, but it wasn't meant to be today. 

  
  


it's a good thing she has a lifetime left to love nayeon.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


and it starts now.

  
  


she's been rehearsing what she would tell nayeon when she finally confesses to her for so long that the risk of her forgetting about it is almost ruled out. but when she steps into an empty elevator, a wide and majestic bouquet of flowers in hand made up of light purple lilacs, pink roses and white peonies she remembers nayeon has always loved, her nerves are too tense for her to remember a word of what she was supposed to say. 

  
  


"something about… how she's always been the one? no, that's cliché." sana sighs, trembling hands rubbing at her temple in an attempt to come up with something new quickly. "i shouldn't tell her i love her today, that won't end well, just… breathe." 

  
  


the thought of cameras filming her current breakdown doesn't brush her mind, and when the doors open on the right floor, she backs away from them until her back hits the wall, as if scared to take any step that will bring her closer to nayeon. but when a few employees pass by and see her holding a giant bouquet of flowers, pausing to stare at her curiously, she supposes now is too late to back down. she didn't spend the past few nights awake in her bed reminiscing old memories to run away, not when she's come this far. 

  
  


but when she enters the office area nayeon has claimed as a second home and momo almost walks right into her, she starts panicking all over again. 

  
  


"d-did you want to talk to nayeon?" momo asks, suspiciously looking at the bouquet as she tries to understand why exactly sana would want to offer anything to her boss. not that nayeon doesn't deserve such nice attentions, it's more about the fact that it's coming from sana. "i fear she's not available for the moment. something about looking into better names for the dog of a friend, she couldn't stop talking about "monster" being a better fit." 

  
  


but right before sana can think of an answer, the door to the devil's lair opens. nayeon's eyes immediately fall on sana, as if she knew exactly what and who she would find outside of her office, but they quickly trail down to land on the flowers- which is pretty normal considering the bouquet almost entirely hides sana's face. 

  
  


"what's all this for?"

  
  


"t-the flowers?" sana clears her throat when she realizes that she can't help stuttering, panic rising in her chest when nayeon crosses her arms in a way that screams impatience. "oh. that's for momo!"

  
  


without thinking, sana hands the assistant the bouquet and takes a step back. a single glare from nayeon was enough for her to lose all of her confidence and all she can think about now is what if she was wrong about her feelings being returned. what if all she gains from this is nayeon making fun of her. but before she can turn around and leave, nayeon closes the distance between them and grabs her wrist. 

  
  


she looks confused by her behavior but ignores a blushing momo to turn to face her. "you came here to talk right? i have some time on my hands, so let's do this now." 

  
  


and there's really no way for her to escape now. 

  
  


(later, she will thank nayeon for it. and she will understand that she was never the only one supposed to take a step forward.

  
  


but right now, and for what must be the first time of her life, sana truly hates nayeon.)

  
  


the office door closing behind them feels like it seals her destiny, like she's not in control of what happens here anymore, and she wonders if the years they spent apart from one another but never far enough to miss each other were all meant to lead them to this moment. the simple thought of this being how it's meant to be works in calming her nerves, and although the trembling of her hands does not stop, it's enough for her to know what to say.

  
  


"actually, i didn't come here regarding the cover. or anything professional, really." 

  
  


nayeon stops on the way to her chair, instead choosing to stay standing in front of sana. a part of herself, the same one that wants her to stay by her side at all times, keeps her from moving away, and she believes she should trust it for once. "what is it this time?"

  
  


taking a deep breath, sana finally manages to look up from the floor in order to stare right at her. the usual harshness one would find in her eyes is gone, replaced with a warmth that tries to be comforting, a sight sana has only rarely seen from her. 

  
  


"i know you told me you didn't want to be involved with anyone years ago- i mean, seriously involved. and i completely respect that, because i know this isn't easy for you, i know there's minyoung and your job and you have a ton of things to think of when-"

  
  


"sana." nayeon cuts her off, hands now gripping the edge of the desk in an attempt to stay grounded. certainly because she knows what she's trying to say, because she wants to scream it into the void too. "straight to the point, please." 

  
  


"would you make an exception?" she gulps, nervously fiddling with her fingers as she stops breathing, time coming to a stop meanwhile she waits, waits for nayeon to either deliver the final strike or to take the final step. "for me."

  
  


and thankfully for her nerves, sana really does not have to wait for long before a wide smile replaces nayeon's earlier confusion. there are unshed tears shining in her eyes, sparkling with the sunlight passing through half-closed blinds, and she doesn't doubt them being of an unexpected happiness nayeon simply can not express with words. a smile of her own mirrors nayeon's as she walks closer to her, stopping right in front of sana and looking down at her hands as if contemplating reaching for them. 

  
  


but before she can do that, nayeon seems to be reminded of a small detail and rushes out of her office.

  
  


"these are mine." she says, taking the flowers the assistant was about to put in a vase rather strongly. "find yourself a girlfriend of your own, momo." 

  
  


and when nayeon walks back into her office, closing the door behind herself, momo simply shrugs and goes back to work, oblivious to what is happening in there- and not particularly wanting to find out. 

  
  


sana, on the hand, stares in shock at nayeon- firstly because she's pretty sure that she just used the word 'girlfriend' to refer to her, secondly because she's currently arranging the bouquet on her desk as if she didn't just ask her out. but then again, this is nayeon, and nothing about her current behavior is out of the ordinary. so she decides to wait, because a few more minutes will not feel like much compared to years of waiting for this moment.

  
  


"girlfriend?" 

  
  


"oh, were you not going to ask me out?" nayeon asks, still working on putting the flowers in a vase, making sure they have enough room. "because if that's the case i'll do it myself. sana, will you invite me to the restaurant tonight?" 

  
  


nayeon is startled when hands settle on her waist, turning her around when she refuses to do so herself. her heart is beating fast, so fast that she can hear it pounding in her eardrums in a deafening music. sana is staring at her with eyes that shine from unshed tears, and brings her in a tight hold she simply can not escape when she stays quiet. and only then does she realize that she's been crying all along, tears landing on her silk shirt as her own arms settle around her neck, holding onto her, the anchor of her life, as tight as possible.

  
  


despite this being the first time she's seen her cry, sana does not comment on it, and instead makes sure those tears only are ones of happiness and wonder, until nayeon allows her to dry them. by doing so, she wants her to understand that she knows what it's like to be scared, to cross a line that might end up hurting her more than it will do her any good. she wants nayeon to know that she trusts her, and she should feel free to do the same, because she's not about to let go of her now. not ever. not after she understood that waiting is not the solution to repressed feelings. 

  
  


"girlfriend it is, then." 

  
  


and when it makes nayeon cry harder on her shoulder, sana understands how deeply this connection between them goes. a connection that years of hatred and of painful love have never succeeded in hurting. 

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"what are you going to order?" sana asks, looking at the menu and wondering what she herself will choose. she's never been good at this, usually finding three dishes she would like and spending a good ten minutes trying to pick one. but it seems nayeon is not having such issues considering she has just mindlessly thrown the menu on the table to lean back in her seat and watch her.

  
  


"oh, i'll let you choose for me."

  
  


pausing in her reading to look up at her date, her eyes widen a bit when she sees nayeon smirking- it doesn't take much for anyone to know that this never means anything good. 

  
  


"is this some kind of test i'm not aware of?"

  
  


nayeon scoffs, but her smirk is still there, made even more threatening by the dark red dior lipstick she put on their way here. "do you genuinely think i would base my decision to actually date you based on what you will choose to order for me?"

  
  


a beat of silence follows her words, sana seemingly lost in her thoughts as she considers what had not meant to be a real question, until she nods. "yeah, I think you would." 

  
  


and when nayeon genuinely looks offended by her remark, sana simply shrugs and proceeds to go back to reading the menu. a few minutes later, a miso soup is placed in front of her and along with it, a bottle of an expensive french wine she remembers drinking with sana quite a long time ago, and her pout turns into a hungry smile.

  
  


"good?" 

  
  


nayeon hums, reaching for a spoon. "i guess you're doing great for now. might even get to see the red set i chose for this special occasion." 

  
  


and even when sana accidentally chokes on her soup, begging for her to know if it's the one she herself designed not long ago, nayeon refuses to reply. it's not like sana will not be getting an answer to her questions in a few hours anyway.

  
  
  


\-----

  
  
  


"are you going to get married to mommy?" 

  
  


panic spreading in her chest, sana pauses and with her minyoung, the entrance to her school right in front of them and with it the crowd of parents who would all love to eavesdrop on their conversation. looking down at the little girl whose grip on her hand only tightens, she takes a deep breath, wishing nayeon would be here for such a discussion. kneeling down, she comes at her level, facing a curious and it seems very smart child.

  
  


"who told you about your mommy and i?" 

  
  


"no one did." minyoung shakes her head, getting even more confused by the second. "mommy told me she loves someone and i guessed it was you." 

  
  


"oh, i see." sana isn't able to hide her smile then, laughing when she realizes nayeon is really not good at this whole hiding their relationship thing. they had both agreed on waiting before telling minyoung about it, mostly because she's the most precious part of nayeon's life and she would hate for her to get attached to someone who might end up leaving. it's been a month, and they both believed it to be working. but that was without counting on nayeon's very obvious change of behavior. 

  
  


she'd told nayeon a while back that she looks in love, and that it would make hiding it a lot harder. it suits her, really, happiness. and she's glad to be the reason behind it. glad to be the one.

  
  


(she always was. but it's life changing, to have her acknowledge it.)

  
  


"so, are you getting married? sooyoung said that when you get married, you get a ring, and mommy has a new one. i think that means you're going to be my second mommy."

  
  


the pure innocence shining in her eyes is what drives sana to laugh even harder, and she lets go of her hand to bring her in a tight hug, minyoung returning it without second thought. 

  
  


"would you be okay with that?"

  
  


she nods excitedly against sana's shoulder. "will you make me a dress? i want a really fancy wedding dress." 

  
  


"of course." and that's certainly when sana decides that one day, in the near future, she will indeed get down on one knee in front of nayeon, and slip a ring of her own on her finger. for her daughter to support their relationship so wholeheartedly is something she didn't know she needed, and it feels as if after all this time, everything finally is as it should be. "i'll make you an even prettier dress than your mommy's. now go, can't risk you being late." 

  
  


minyoung runs toward her friends after leaving a soft peck on her cheek, and sana feels a single tear cascading down her cheek as she watches her. there's something about feeling like she's part of a family, of nayeon's family, that makes it hard for her to stop her tears. and as she brushes them away, her phone vibrating in her back pocket with what she knows must be a message from nayeon telling her she misses her- she's been doing that a lot lately, not even an hour after they part ways- sana's tears only fall harder. 

  
  


(she buys a ring on her way to work on that same day, a small but nonetheless tasteful diamond she knows nayeon will love. 

  
  


and she keeps it hidden for a year, until the right moment comes, until nayeon lets go of each of the walls she tried to keep around herself and reaches the end of the way. an end that sana only sees as a new beginning. 

  
  


quite like the time she first confessed, nayeon forgets to give sana a clear answer, but she understands. she understands what her tears mean, what she wants to say but can't, for the sole reason that her voice seems to be failing her. she understands the words nayeon whisper against her lips, because she too, loves her more than words could ever express.

  
  


and she believes nayeon has understood this now. she believes that's where it brought them, the risk that could have ended in loneliness. 

  
  


and it was all worth it, in the end.) 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> miIfyeon on twitter <3


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